Cognitive Behavioral Therapy f...

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective treatment for depression. Unlike any other psychotherapy CBT is short term (time limited) and treatment focused. Problem behaviors and thinking are identified, prioritized, and are addressed.   People with depression commonly have a strong negative belief about:   Self: People who are experiencing depression generally has an unfavorable […]

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Drug Addiction Rehabilitation ...

Drug addiction is one of the hard life sufferings for the drug addicts and also for the ones around them. No doubt, it is a tough situation to see your loved one abusing drugs badly and at times you may feel helpless too. But it is never impossible to help them get out of it. […]

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Effects of Drug Addiction

A number of reasons spike when you question as to why people get addicted to the Drugs. Some of them simply use it to see what it feels like while others take it to come out of their depression and stress problems. No matter what is the reason, the use of drugs can eventually lead […]

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Bipolar Disorder in Children

Is your child suddenly bursting with energy and active than other kids their age? Does your child suddenly feel depressed and have no interest in anything at all? Do other people say your child is too excited or too moody? Does he or she talk really fast about a lot of different things or talk nothing […]

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My Drug Addiction Stories

Am Mohan (name changed), I have been a cannabis user for the past 10 years. This is my story on how I got my life back to the normal track, what made me become an addict and what helped me recover. Am going to share my experience with all the readers. Want to see my […]

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Giving advice is wrong? You must be joking!!

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When a friend or a family member would come to you to discuss an issue they are having, we are ready (always) to dispense our advice to them. In the fast paced world, who has time to ponder over the problems. Isn’t it simpler to focus on the solution of it, so why not give advice!!

How many of you find it hard to resist the temptation to give solutions. How ironic – we may not have solutions for our own problems but we don’t fail to give advice to others. Rather than being a good listener and understand what another person is saying & feeling, we are more engaged in giving solution to the other person.

So do you know what is wrong with giving advice? Well, in the process of giving advice, unconsciously you are giving a message to another person that he/she doesn’t have the resources to solve their own problems. You are almost paralyzing their own problem solving ability. This gives them a feeling of “not being good enough or capable enough”.

The best way to give an advice is not give an advice at all; rather just be a good listener.

So what do I do instead of giving advice?

Instead of telling people “here is what you need to do”. It is best to keep shut, listen to them. Help them talk their heart out, so that they can articulate their own problem. Better than giving a response, is to help them talk to you by using open-ended questions and encouraging the person to think. In the conversation, the best suitable outcome for the person would become self evident.

This way, you are also equipping the person to find their own out and most importantly, believe in themselves.

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