What is a Panic Attack?

A woman named Bella in her mid 30’s was once rushed to the emergency room of a nearby hospital. She was profusely sweating and she felt like her heart was racing at one instance, such that she was unable to take a breath. She and her husband were certain that, she had a heartache. But, […]

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Internet Addiction

Do you play video games on the Internet in overabundance? Are you enthusiastically shopping online? Can’t physically quit checking Facebook? If your answer is yes for any of these questions, you may have the internet addiction.   The world which we live in today is full of advanced technological inventions. Nowadays education, entertainment, communication, and […]

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Is Schizophrenia Genetic?

All of us are aware of how genetics plays an important role in various illnesses. But, have you ever imagined as to what has heredity to do with Schizophrenia? This is one of the common questions many people ask whether schizophrenia is a hereditary disease. The answer is yes and no! Yes, Schizophrenia does have […]

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Guide for caregivers for Schiz...

Schizophrenia can affect an individual to an extent that they turn incapable to taking care of themselves. At this time, the role of a caregiver, family or friend, becomes important. Taking care of an individual with schizophrenia can be very difficult as they can get aggressive or rigid suddenly due to their symptoms. Medications and […]

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Food Addiction

Is your loved one eating in excess, or even more than what is essential for their proper nutrition or a healthy living? Then, it may be a sign or indication of food addiction. Here a person perpetually engages in ravaging behaviors of overeating. This is the reason for which some people cannot sway themselves around […]

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Giving advice is wrong? You must be joking!!

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When a friend or a family member would come to you to discuss an issue they are having, we are ready (always) to dispense our advice to them. In the fast paced world, who has time to ponder over the problems. Isn’t it simpler to focus on the solution of it, so why not give advice!!

How many of you find it hard to resist the temptation to give solutions. How ironic – we may not have solutions for our own problems but we don’t fail to give advice to others. Rather than being a good listener and understand what another person is saying & feeling, we are more engaged in giving solution to the other person.

So do you know what is wrong with giving advice? Well, in the process of giving advice, unconsciously you are giving a message to another person that he/she doesn’t have the resources to solve their own problems. You are almost paralyzing their own problem solving ability. This gives them a feeling of “not being good enough or capable enough”.

The best way to give an advice is not give an advice at all; rather just be a good listener.

So what do I do instead of giving advice?

Instead of telling people “here is what you need to do”. It is best to keep shut, listen to them. Help them talk their heart out, so that they can articulate their own problem. Better than giving a response, is to help them talk to you by using open-ended questions and encouraging the person to think. In the conversation, the best suitable outcome for the person would become self evident.

This way, you are also equipping the person to find their own out and most importantly, believe in themselves.

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